I was honored and humbled to be invited to Cardinal Cadette‘s ceremonies of the Rite of Baptism¹ today, although I had to leave immediately afterward. It was held at All Saints Catholic Church, which I had not visited although I knew Mr. and Mrs. Tldz were parishioners there.

A few weeks back, while Mrs. Tldz was still recovering from the Cadette’s difficult birth, I took Mr. Tldz to the mall for an errand and some fresh air that I think both of us needed. On the way back we fell into conversation about Atlanta and its various parishes.

During the first three years I lived here, I was a parishioner at Sacred Heart Church (it was elevated after I moved) but I never really felt comfortable there; as a result, I never did more than attend Mass. As a result of my 2009 move, I now go right past Mary Our Queen on my way to work. But my first Mass there was my only Mass there².

I told Mr. Tldz that I really wasn’t sure if, or where, I could find a welcoming parish³ in the Atlanta area. As such, I’d stopped attending Mass although I keenly felt the lack of the Sacraments. He said he’d ask around a little to see if he could find out anything.

He did not mention that his own parish — All Saints — has a JustFaith group⁴ and is involved in the type of social justice ministries to which I feel drawn. I found out today while looking up the parish address online. Apparently I’d had blinders on; my assumption was that because a Catholic of traditional lifestyle was welcome there, a Catholic of a non-traditional lifestyle was not.

Given the makeup of the parish at Cathedral in Raleigh⁵, I really should’ve known better.

I’d arrived 25 minutes early, to discover that the Tldz family and friends weren’t there. Another family was, also for a baptism. They invited me into the ceremony without hesitation or even asking if I was Catholic.

A few minutes later, a non-celebrant deacon noticed my obvious nervousness — I’d been standing to the side out of respect for the family and friends — and came over. He didn’t have any idea who I was but, rather than asking me to leave⁶, he asked me what was wrong. When I told him, he checked the schedule and confirmed that I was in the right place.

Due to some dynamics that relate back to the time when Mr. Tldz and I both lived in North Carolina, I had not met either of the godparents or anyone else at the baptism. I had only met Mrs. Tldz once. But again, I was invited into the group (who clearly knew one another) without any hesitation at all.

An immediate assumption that I belonged, despite being a total unknown, has never happened to me in Atlanta, at a parish or anywhere else. It happened three times in the hour-and-a-half I was at All Saints for Cardinal Cadette’s baptism.

I live pretty close to All Saints; the drive took me eight minutes (that’s why I was so early). Thanks to an invitation and welcomes involving people I barely know, I didn’t just have a chance to participate in one of the Sacraments I so badly miss. I think I might have also had the chance to find a new spiritual home.

1. She was baptized in extremis on July 4. Catholics only accept one baptism, so today’s ceremony was a formal completion of the Rite. As it happens, my own baptism occurred in the same manner, which is why I’m familiar with the concept.
2. The parish is clearly very conservative and I am not.
3. My usual quip is, “the Church wants me. I’m not so sure about most parishes.”
4. I completed the 30-week program in the 2003-04 season.
5. I was a parishioner for five years and always felt welcome.
6. Allowing strange, uninvited adults around little children, outside of large group activities like Mass, is generally not a good idea in a Catholic church in the United States.